I’m a sucker for reading physical books (sorry to all my audiobook/Kindle friends — I’m working on it). Back in 2017, I made a New Year’s resolution to read six books that year outside of what was required for school. I succeeded that year and have kept this goal nearly every year since. If you’re doing the math in your head, that’s one book every two months. For those of us who are in school, work long hours, or support families and loved ones, this goal is right in the sweet spot of being challenging and attainable. Setting this goal has led to me reading memoirs, fiction, and nonfiction works that have drastically expanded my self-awareness and overall knowledge.
In the course of my reading, there have been a handful of books that have moved me. These books have moved me either because they presented paradigm-shifting ideas, gave me words I didn’t possess to express my thoughts better or came at a time in my life when I needed to learn the lessons contained in its pages.
Here are five books that changed my brain and why:
Gender Talk: The Struggle for Women’s Equality in African-American Communities by Beverly Guy-Sheftall and Johnnetta Cole
I saw the colorful cover of this book appear on my sister’s bookshelf when she started at Spelman College back in 2014 but didn’t think much of it then. I decided to read it at the end of 2019, and boy did it not disappoint. The book focuses on women’s struggle for equality within the African-American community. From the erasure of Black women’s role in the Civil Rights Movement of the '60s to the way rap music evolved to be a socially permissible landing zone for misogynistic sentiments, Guy-Sheftall and Cole introduced ideas that left me with something to chew on. I gained insight into the historical struggles of African-American women in a way I had never before. After reading, I felt like I could no longer claim ignorance regarding this particular struggle, and it forced me to interrogate the role I could play in making things better.
Just Mercy by Bryan Stevenson
Bryan Stevenson is one of the few people I do not know personally that I look up to. Mercy and grace are concepts that I was exposed to first in the church, and I’ve realized just how difficult they are to practice as I’ve gotten older. The story of Bryan Stevenson and Walter McMillan, a Black man falsely accused of murder and sentenced to death, weaves together the powerful ideals of grace, forgiveness, and mercy in a system plagued by racism and injustice. This book drove home the fact that none of us are the sum of the worst things we have ever done. Practicing forgiveness and mercy is a challenge for me, but I feel that this book helped me make strides in realizing that each of us has a role to play in creating a world that is free from pain and negativity. Just Mercy is a paradigm-shifting story teaching us that even those left on the farthest margins of society are worth fighting for.
The Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown
This is a regular re-read for me. The title of this one drew me in because, on the surface, how could imperfection be a gift? As a shame researcher, Brené Brown shows her readers that owning and accepting our entire life story — faults and all — is a necessary step toward wholehearted living. This book was suggested to me by my organic chemistry professor at a time in my life when I truly needed to read it. As someone who struggles with acceptance and perfectionism, this book reminds me that the goal is not to be perfect but to be our complete selves. I come back to this one as I continue to work on myself and try to live a wholehearted life.
The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey
The lord and savior of personal leadership, Stephen R. Covey, has broken down seven habits that he proposes are practiced by highly effective people. This book is different than other self-help books in the sense that he starts by telling the reader that improvement is an inside-out process. No shortcuts. No quick fixes. The only way you can change the things you want to change is to go deep into yourself and understand your values, your relationships, and your character. My favorite concept from this book is that any public victory is preceded by a private victory. This is one of the most powerful ideas that I try to remember as I continue moving through life. So, if you’ve identified any changes that you want to make in your life, I highly suggest reading this one.
The Will to Change by bell hooks
I am fully aware that I look/sound like the “Awe, not my feminist literature books” guy with some of my suggestions, but if it gets someone to consider reading something challenging, then I can live with that. I finished this book earlier this spring, and I would recommend it to everyone, with special attention to men. hooks does not mince her words when it comes to calling out the problems that patriarchy causes for men. Anger, loneliness, the compartmentalization of the spirit, and even harmful behaviors can be tied back to patriarchal notions of manhood. hooks follows through on these critiques with suggestions on how men can use their “will to change” to become more integrated, whole human beings. This is required reading for men who want to learn how to love themselves and the people in their lives better.
Honorable mention goes out to Caste by Isabel Wilkerson, The Magic Strings of Frankie Presto by Mitch Albom, and Sister Outsider by Audre Lorde. Hopefully, you feel inspired to grab that book you’ve been meaning to read for the last six months and get a few pages in. Happy reading!
-kjf
